Self-Critique

I have enjoyed the majority of the blogs assigned throughout the semester and always tried my best when writing them. At first my style of writing was very formal, but as the semester progressed I became more relax and my writing became more personal. As far as my best blog, I believe it was the Writing about Learning blog assigned early in October. While writing it I didn’t think I had done that great of a job because I didn’t understand the prompt very well. I just gave it my best shot and wrote about my opinions concerning the nature of learning. The comments I got for this particular blog were very positive and I was proud of my work after reading the praise. All the blogs we had to write about our experience in a hybrid course were my worst blogs. Writing five hundred words on that topic was a little difficult from time to time, but I understand why we had to write them so I still took them seriously.

Blogs were similar to homework assignments and I viewed them as a necessary task. Some were very interesting, such as the Challenging Media blog which discussed the nature of Disney movies. I truly enjoyed watching that video and writing that blog because I had no idea about the true intentions of Disney. I learned from the blogs that made us discuss controversial topics such as this Disney blog. I do not plan on blogging outside of this course, but I do plan to continue to write in my journal. I’m too old fashion to continue a journal online and prefer to hand write certain things. My relationship with writing publicly has not changed much, simply from being formal to casual throughout the semester, as I mentioned earlier.

Annotated Bibliography

I have decided to change my original response essay topic, movies against promiscuity, due to a lack of sources. I am now expanding on the essay titled Teenage Pregnancy and Single Parents: 16 and Pregnant. While being raised by a single parent can lead to young pregnancies, my response essay will state that there are other reasons for teenage pregnancy besides a lack of parental guidance

           

          Source 1: This article describes five reasons for teenage pregnancy. The first is a lack of parental guidance, which is what the preliminary essay described. The second is adolescent sexual behavior. The third is an inadequate knowledge about safe sex. The fourth is exploitation by older men. The fifth reason is socio economic factors.

           

          <http://health.top54u.com/post/Causes-of-Teenage-Pregnancy.aspx>.

           

          Source 2: This article describes the reasoning behind teenage pregnancies in America and in other countries, mostly third world nations. In third world countries early pregnancies are a result of traditional and early marriage. Being fertile is a gift therefore; being pregnant is seen as a good thing. The in-take of drugs is also mentioned as a reason for young pregnancies. Also, sexual abuse is a main cause for teenage pregnancies.

           <http://ezinearticles.com/?What-Are-The-Causes-Of-Teenage-Pregnancy?&id=753619>.

           

          Source 3: This source discusses not only the causes of teenage pregnancy, but also the effects and consequences. Some of the causes were long term relationships, carefree sex, and passion. These are not very strong reasons however, they are still relevant. The effects include early responsibility, changes in body, and life-style change. I’m not sure if I can use these effects of this source just yet.

http://pregnancy.ygoy.com/unplanned-pregnancy/causes-and-effects-of-teenage-pregnancy/

Response Essay

The topic that I have chosen to write about is Natalie’s essay titled Losing Virginity to the Big Screen’s Lies. Her argument states that due to big budget movies dramatizing sex and one night stands, without displaying any of the consequences, makes promiscuity acceptable in today’s society. Although I agree with the basic complaint and understand where she is coming from I also think there are many movies that show true hardship concerning this problem which audiences can learn from as well. I read quite a few of my classmate’s essays and found Natalie’s entertaining and something that I could counter well, as I found myself creating counter arguments while I read. Although I do agree with her, as I did with most of the essays I read in class, I can think of a well written counter argument that would make for a perfect response essay to her preliminary essay.

 The main point I would like to make in my response essay would be that not all movies promote promiscuity in young adults. Some even teach viewers the consequences of such actions by creating story lines about hard working single mothers, determined single fathers, desperate pregnant teenagers, and depressed HIV patients. These recent and popular movies that present such admirable characters include Waitress, The Pursuit of Happiness, Juno, and Rent along with so many others that teach viewers the value of safe sex. Waitress shows what it’s truly like for a woman to raise a child alone, The Pursuit of Happiness displays the lifestyle of a single father with no money, Juno leaves nothing out in teen pregnancy, and Rent brutally shows the darker side of contracting HIV and AIDS. There are millions of movies and each one can send out many messages, so to state that all movies today send out messages to encourage having sex at a young age is extreme.

Another point I would like to make is the fact that it is a parent’s responsibility to teach his or her children to practice safe and appropriate sex, not movies. Movies are for audience’s entertainment and not to be viewed as a lesson to learn from. I understand that people act certain ways based off of what they continuously see and if they continually see movies that have promiscuous characters in them then audiences begin to think this is ok. This is especially true if viewers look up to the actors and actresses as well and would like to be them. However, if a teenager is old enough to go see a movie that has promiscuous behavior, then they are old enough to know that it is wrong and inappropriate to act the same. This is where parents must step in and guide their children in the right direction when they begin to stray. There are also other means of media that can influences children and young teenagers in the wrong directions, not just big screen movies. These media’s include television (notably reality television), advertisements, and music.

Challenging Media

I thought the video Mickey Mouse: Disney, Childhood and Corporate Power was very interesting, however, I found it slightly overly analytical. I will admit that Disney has an enormous obligation to fulfill as story tellers and movie makers for children of all generations all over the world. Every child at some point will watch and unconsciously interpret a Disney film and it is the job of the creators at Disney to make sure that the messages sent out are ones that are appropriate for children to learn. Disney truly shapes our children’s imaginations. I was very taken by the comment made by Dr. Henry Giroux who states “it has a certain romance about it that allows us, in some way, to treat Disney as the ultimate form of fantasy, a fantasy that never needs to be questioned.” I could not have said that better myself and agree with this statement wholeheartedly. I believe that it is this exuberance of fantasy that keeps children watching, and re-watching, Disney movies throughout the years.

It is clear that Disney has tremendous influence over the youth of this generation and past generations and I understand that some people argue against Disney as teaching dangerous lessons to these children. One women in the video stated that the message of Beauty and the Beast was that girls should stay with a “beast” that harms you because all you have to do is find the “prince” within. Another women stated that Chinese people were put down in Disney’s Lady and the Tramp because of the, clearly Chinese, evil Siamese cats. I think that these views are too overly critical and overly analytical. I believe that the message for Beauty and the Beast is completely different from what this lady makes it out to be as Belle was a well-read, intelligent women who didn’t put up with characters like Gaston. I also think that Mulan is a great movie for children to watch to appreciate and learn about Chinese culture. That movie was very respectful to Chinese traditions. There are many more types of media that send worse messages to children these days, such as the lyrics to modern rap and hip-hop music. I believe the music industry is infinitely worse than Disney in the values and morals it teaches. All you have to do is turn on G105 on the radio to understand my conclusion.

Even though I defend Disney’s ethics, I was very disturbed toward the end of this video when I heard that the view of Disney was as follows: “we have no obligation to make history, we have no obligation to make art, and we have no obligation to make a statement. To make money is our only objective.” I find this statement hard to believe as each and every Disney movie has defied the test of time and made history, the animation is considered to be art, and each storyline told will make a statement. Based off of these conclusions it is clear that Disney has a much greater obligation than the selfish objective to make money.

Dissenting Voices

I disagree with everything Philip Kitcher has written in the Philosophy of Science textbook titled Abusing Science: The Case Against Creationism. Because I am in this outlandish philosophy class I have to attempt to read your material about the theories of how the world was created, the meaning of life, and if there is a God which confuses me for days at a time. This is the true reason why I disagree with your writing; why even attempt to answer the big questions of what the differences between religion and science are concerning the creation of the world if each person holds their own beliefs? Therefore, I disagree with your overall topic. This is not to say that I don’t enjoy a meaningful or deep conversation every now and then but this material is so deep and personal that it should remain in private conversation, not the classroom.

It’s not that the material you discuss is poorly written because your arguments concerning Evolution versus Creationism are actually very eloquently stated, albeit sometimes hard to follow.  Using the phrase “quietness is wholeness in the center of stillness” (Kitcher, p.45, 2010) will not make your ideas become any clearer to the reader even though it is well written. Also titling a chapter “The History of Life” (Kitcher, p. 27, 2010) or “The Meaning of Life” (Kitcher, pg. 56, 2010) may scare your readers off.

It’s not that your material is offensive because in order to offend people they have to understand the argument giving offense, and your book is not something easy to read on a summer day with a glass of lemonade. My point is that people will not be offended unless they understand what your conclusions are about the two theories of how life began which, as most people are not Creationists scientists or Evolutionary scientists, they cannot. Your writing would only give offense if someone is truly a Creationist and believe that a higher being created the universe because every line in your book proves your obvious inclination toward the belief of Evolution and pragmatic scientific theories presented by Darwin (it’s the one thing we both agree on).Therefore, because I agree about your theories of Evolution I am not offended at all by your writing just what you write about.

It’s not that your arguments are incorrect because everyone has their own beliefs on how the world began and if someone chooses a religious idea over a scientific one than that is a matter of opinion which cannot be proven wrong. I simply disagree with the idea of writing an entire textbook on this subject to begin with. I know philosophy is often defined, by perplexed college students, as the “art of confusing people” but throwing in the religion versus science complex into the mix gives the word “confusion” a whole new level. My only outside sources would be the other students in my class who also attempt to understand your ideas and they would all agree that reading this book does the opposite of summarize the origin of the universe and mainly confuses.

Online Interaction

Sure, I think blog posts are helpful. We only meet once a week so it a good way to stay up to date with what were discussing in class. It’s also a good way to communicate with other classmates and get new opinions on certain topics. It also helps to know, when we have blogs on what our essay formatting ideas are, that others students are just as nervous to write the paper and yourself. Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up with your work and frustrations and you may think that you’re the only one struggling at times. Getting a comment that says something like “I think we’re all nervous about that part” or “I know how you feel about picking a topic I’m having the same concerns” always brings me back to reality.

It’s pretty rare that true conversations start from blog comments. At least for me it is. I have only begun a slight conversation about something concerning science; I forget the true topic now. Ms. Clark got into it though and gave her opinion and she even said in the comment “this doesn’t really have anything to do with your comment Ashley, sorry” which I thought was funny. So that led to something more than just a blog comment but that’s as far as I have ever gone. Normally comments are just there to offer encouragement or compliment an idea that was stated in the blog.

I actually prefer the blogs more than the forum discussions because you have more opportunities to be creative in a blog post than answering questions in a forum discussion. Plus, I feel blog posts are more personable and casual than a forum discussion which is nice. Forum discussions are more like class work or peer reviews where as blogs and blog comments are more like journal entries and discussions with friends and classmates.

I am not dissatisfied with my blog experience and think my fellow classmates are doing a great job keeping up with blogs and blog comments. We’re all new to this hybrid type class so I would never say anything bad about how others are handling it. I do need to finish writing the discussion part in my qualitative media essay though and I have about one hundred more words to write here so that would be a downfall to blogging and commenting every now and then. It just sometimes gets in the way of the more important things, but time management can solve that problem.

I also just accidently did next week’s blog by mistake so this is the second set of five hundred words I am writing toady, along with my essay. But that could also be a positive thing about hybrid classes because I just accidently got ahead. So to sum up: I enjoy blogs however don’t think they lead to more conversations as I only had one true conversation; I think my classmates are doing a great job with them as well; and I am not unsatisfied with the interaction experience.

  

Qualitative Research Concerns

My biggest concern with qualitative research is just the fact that I have never done this type of research and writing before. I know there is a certain format that you have to follow and certain things that need to be addressed when discussing the chosen topic. The last essay had a few new parts as well such as the abstract and catching on wasn’t too difficult so I’m not too concerned about formatting, simply curious. The fact that we even have a format to follow for this essay is a relief because for the audience effect paper I had a difficult time creating a format that would flow well. Also the interviews that could be involved are a somewhat foreign method of gaining information for me and I am not exactly sure who to ask, classmates or adults. I don’t really know how to use the information I gather in interviews when writing this essay nor do I feel I truly know the questions that should be asked, I only have an idea. I understand that I need to get opinions on the differences between two interpretations of a story but I have only a vague idea on how to use those questions and answers within my writing. I also have a few concerns about actually writing open-ended questions for these interviews which is not something I thought I would need to be concerned about. However, after class on Thursday when Ms. Clark examined a few qualitative questions I realized it might be harder than I had originally thought. All of these concerns will probably lessen once I decide on a topic and begin using this topic to understand the prompt a little more. I don’t believe I will have a problem staying away from quantitative research because we already wrote one paper that involved numbers and scientific data and one essay on that is enough for me.

In contrast, I am looking forward to picking a topic for this essay because there are so many options and directions I could look into. These topics are also a lot more fun than the last essay as well which is a good thing. If I had to choose between the theories of evolution vs. the little mermaid I would choose the fairy tale to write about. There are so many books and stories that have been altered and changed into movies that the topics are pretty much unlimited and I’m looking forward to writing about these differences. I am seriously considering writing about the differences between Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice and the 2005 film interpretation of the story and how this film has modernized the tale for the 21^th century viewer. Interviewing will be a challenge but I feel it is necessary for the qualitative research involved in this essay and figuring out whom to interview and what to ask could become difficult. If I write about Pride and Prejudice that rules out interviewing my parents or the rest of my family because I’m pretty sure I’m the only one whose ever picked up a Jane Austen novel in my house.

Writing about Learning

Of course you can learn something from an experience or a course. In fact, I’m convinced that those two options are the best, if not some of the only ways, that a person can learn new things. Anyone can tell if they learned something from such examples if, when given the same material later or presented the same situation, they do not make the same mistakes as the last time. This is a great way to measure how much a person has learned because the point of learning is to gain new information in order to be better prepared when shown the material in life. If a person has learned than they will handle what they have previously learned with ease and not make similar mistakes.

I don’t believe it matters whether this learning is transformative or not. Not all learning has to change a person’s opinions on certain ideas and topics. Learning just has to enhance a person’s knowledge not transform this knowledge. I do believe that for certain situations transformative learning can be beneficial to a person if the opinion they believed before was incorrect. Then a change in this incorrect information will enhance this person’s knowledge.

My experiences of learning in school have been both transformative and surface. I believe a mixture of the two is the best way to acquire new information and stay informed. I’m not quite sure what this question, in this part of the prompt, is asking. “Does the evidence you have of your own learning allow it to be communicated to others such as students in the class, or the teacher?’” Is this asking if, as a student, I have opportunities to express what I have learned? If this is in fact what this question is asking then my answer is yes. As a student I am forced to show what I have learned my doing projects, taking exams, and other activities. These are present in a classroom specifically to show teachers whether their teaching is benefiting their students and if they are retaining the material.

As a teacher they express what they have learned through teaching this material. They show their knowledge every day, just as students do, if not more by teaching others. One cannot teach unless they fully comprehend the material they wish to talk about. While students prove what they have learned by taking tests, likewise, teachers show the same thing by making the test to begin with.

Everyone judges the things they learn differently because each student or teacher takes away something different from a lesson based on their personal experiences. I might view a C mark as a poor grade a judge myself on this low mark while the student beside me would think a C is a wonderful grade. I’m also extremely hard on myself when it comes to grades and schooling therefore I don’t think anyone judges this learning by grades in a similar way as me. Of course learning can be taught outside the classroom. When a child goes home and tells their parents what they learned in school that day would be taking the knowledge outside the classroom, which would be the goal of teachers everywhere.

Stereotypical News Article

I thought Robbin’s “article” and was very witty and entertaining and made me forget I was even reading an article. He brings up some good points about popular scientific articles when he mentions an author’s use of “weasel-words” to remain vague, the addition of the picture to keep audiences interest every 400 hundred words, and the necessity to have a human interest section to really reach the public. I was surprised to find that the popular article I have chosen, from the magazine Scientific American, did not utilize some of these strategies. The only hint at clichés would be in the authors attempt to remain vague about his findings by adding in “weasel-words” such as “many scientists” and extremely vague headlines such as “surprising findings from popular studies.”

Also the article is four pages long and there is a picture for every page proving the idea that readers need pictures or visual aids to remain interested in a long scientific article. Some are educational, pictures of ancient human’s geographical movements, and others are put in simply to grab reader’s attention, a man’s face formed from colorful legos depicting human changes. These, however, are the only connections I can make from my article to Robbin’s parody. This may be due to the fact that the magazine I have chosen is at a somewhat higher level than other certain education or science magazines and the article was written by an evolutionary biologist and not a regular journalist. The voice and tone of the overall article seems to be very intellectual and informative, meant for well educated adults hoping to further their own understanding of recent scientific data. Robbin’s is obviously trying to reach a specific type of audience that read scientific articles regularly and recognize the patterns he discusses. These tendencies are discussed, however, in a very lighthearted, jovial manner letting the audience know that he is not serious.

Scholarly Article

The two articles I have chosen for the second essay involve recent human evolution. My popular article is from a magazine I physically bought therefore I don’t have a link for it. The link for my scholarly article is:   

http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/pdfviewer/pdfviewer?vid=11&hid=8&sid=af97f182-3299-4ef3-9ebd-cbcbf86d6de3%40sessionmgr104 

Within the past ten years the advances in molecular genetic technology have given way to a major breakthrough in all evolutionary studies but most prominently within the field of human evolution.  New statistics and data on different kinds of DNA variations in human populations have been pouring in and scientists are beginning to understand the importance and value of this variation for future medicine and developmental biology. This also helps scientists fully understand the history of our species. Certain markers, Haploid markers, found on DNA and y chromosomes have proven very valuable in creating the model for evolution of modern humans. Also results from earlier research on specific proteins have been supported by more sophisticated DNA analysis. The evolution of both human genes with language and slowly evolving cultural traits, along with the genetic evolution of some commensal relationships and parasites that have stuck with modern humans since our expansion and movement from Africa to the rest of the world, supports the theory of genetic evolution. This expansion across the globe has caused a sharp increase in the number of modern humans and can be attributed to the gradual sophistication in tools, art, religion, and language since our predecessors. Advances in multidisciplinary research are what make our superior understanding of human’s evolutionary history possible. 

APA Citing:

L. Luca Cavalli-Sforza, Marcus W. Feldman (2003, March 2). The application of molecular genetic approaches to the study of human evolution. Retrieved from http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/pdfviewer/pdfviewer?vid=11&hid=8&sid=af97f182-3299-4ef3-9ebd-cbcbf86d6de3%40sessionmgr104

I have some concerns about this second essay and the research it involves but as I read my articles more and more I realize that I understand more than I originally thought. I had only skimmed both articles before and came to the hasty conclusion that they were nothing alike and that I would have nothing to discuss in my paper. This was quickly proven untrue when I sat down and really read through each paper. I now know that the reason I thought they were dissimilar was because they talk about different aspects of the same thing. The popular article mentions the noticeable changes in humans brought on by evolution such as skin color or Tibetan people's ability to tolerate high altitudes. The scholarly article discusses the unnoticeable changes that have occurred within the body on DNA strands and proteins. There may be some difficulties in making connections between my two articles because I hardly understand either of them (mostly the scholarly article). The more I read them though the clearer they will become so I am not that concerned. I am actually very pleased to find that each article has the same picture depicting a similar scientific finding just in different formats. The scholarly picture is much more advanced than the popular one which reflects the intended audience’s knowledge. I plan to set up my paper with an introduction, a few body paragraphs, and a conclusion. I will choose a couple main differences, perhaps four, and have those become my body paragraphs.

Discussion Forum

I don’t really have a very strong opinion of the discussion forum. I neither loved it nor hated it. To me it was just another assignment. I did the required reading and answered the questions that were required. I did think the article was relevant to what we are discussing in class at this time and what our next essay will be on. I feel this next essay will be a lot more challenging than the last due to the new APA format and the citation and paraphrasing requirements. Also I need all the help I can get when it comes to writing about science and picking out topics about science. Therefore, the articles helped me understand how scientific writing can address different audiences and how to interpret this type of writing.

This assignment reminded me of simply blogging our responses to a reading just on moodle instead of in blog form and with fewer words. It seems to be a mix between blogging and posting peer reviews. I did the discussion forum a little later than other students in the class. Instead of being on moodle during the time span of our class on Tuesday I had to do it an hour later which could have affected my experience. I didn’t have a conversation with a classmate because I missed the discussions that took place between five and seven. It might have been more exciting if I had interacted with the other classmates in real time than a couple of hours later. But I did not get this opportunity so the assignment seemed flat and like the others we have done in class.

I wouldn’t mind having more forum discussions in the future. However, I say this with the same attitude as saying I wouldn’t mind having another blog to write.  My in-the-middle opinion about the whole discussion forum is making this blog a little challenging because I do not feel like I have much to say about the matter. I don’t feel that there could be any improvements with the assignment. The concept of the assignment was straightforward and to the point which made it pretty easy. I did have a question on how to post our responses and how to begin a new topic but when I knew the answers to these questions the assignment was normal and simple.

So I have about a hundred words to go. This is a pretty challenging blog this week.  But this is an open blog which is meant to expose true feelings whether those feelings are strong or not. Unfortunately my feelings were not strong about this topic. I did like the discussion forum; don’t think my inability to write five hundred words on the assignment means I didn’t gain anything from the experience. Let’s see, oh, maybe next time we have a discussion forum I will begin a new topic. I will only do this if I feel very strongly about the topic being discussed and have something to add on the matter. Overall, I liked the assignment.

Entering the Conversation

Liberman’s blog on the nature of bad scientific writing can be very enlightening to audiences by showing them that even scientists can get data wrong. Most of the public that read topics involving science accept blindingly what the author is saying because they assume the author knows more than them. Or, if a writer of bad science uses a lot of numbers and equations, the public would accept his or her proposal because they simply get flustered at the sight of numbers.

While I was reading the textbook, Abusing Science, for my philosophy class I came across something that reflects this idea. The chapter was discussing how a Creationist named Henry Morris argued against the theory of evolution by using formulas and probability statistics to prove that mutations in genetic make ups are rare. Morris’s mathematical findings were proven false by evolutionary scientists meaning his writing was ‘bad science’ that others, who are less informed, could have believed. The evolutionary scientist that proved Morris wrong states “it is hard to resist the impression that all of Morris’s computations are designed to bamboozle those who become weak at the knees at the sight of numbers.” This relates to Liberman’s argument because it is yet another example of how scientists can write inaccurate information and have the public believe it.

Liberman uses the information in a scientific article written by Denis Campbell as evidence to argue his point. Campbell stated that omega-3 fatty acids counteract the effects of ADHD and help children concentrate and do better in school This was proven wrong by scientific experiments which showed that children did not do better in school after treatments of the fish oil making the article that stated it did “bad science.” This could be considered logical evidence because the author of the blog uses data from the findings of these experiments to argue his point. There is also a use of ethical evidence when Liberman attacks the authors of bad science by claiming that they are untrustworthy and their findings most of the time are incorrect. This evidence is helpful because it gives readers an example of how scientist can be wrong in their writings. If Liberman were to state his argument that bad science is written every day without supporting it with an example, readers would be skeptical of his proposal and think him too harsh.

The question Liberman then presents is “how can the ‘health correspondent’ for a serious intellectual newspaper be so incredibly careless? And why hasn't he been fired?” Firing the scientists that write about incorrect findings may be his solution to the problem but it is not mine. Science is a very tricky study and sometimes evidence may seem convincing at first which leads people to believe a conclusion to be true even if it is not. I believe that an important part of what makes a theory “scientific” is its ability to be proven false, or to be falsifiable, when new information comes along. Therefore, my solution would be to simply allow mistakes in scientific writing to be acceptable because science is an ever changing subject that can, and should, be proven false from time to time.

Open Writing

I have always known to censor what I put on the internet because it is permanently placed there for the world to see. That commercial where the girl keeps taking down an embarrassing photo from the school bulletin board, only for it to pop right back up every time, got its message across. If you haven’t seen that commercial disregard that last sentence. I use this discretion when I put pictures and comments on facebook and all other online websites, this blog included. If someone told me before school started that I would be writing in a blog daily I would have laughed at them because I never thought I would have my own blog on the internet. However, this English class requires blog entries so I am now aware of what I expose in each entry because I know anyone could have access to it. I would like to avoid getting into trouble over something I write in this blog therefore I read over each entry to make sure every point I make is appropriate for other people to read.

There are benefits to publishing one’s writing on the internet and I feel that we are exploiting these benefits in class. We are using the internet’s and blog’s accessibility to understand our peers ideas on certain topics discussed in class. This could have so many benefits as it allows anyone in the class to expand on their own ideas by reading their fellow students comments. This gives us a better understanding on topics we may otherwise struggle with such as rhetorical appeals and how to write our current essay. No other subject but English can give you the opportunity to see every other students understanding and approach to a certain topic discussed in class which is a major benefit to writing in a blog every week. Also other people, including students in different colleges with similar assignments, can view these blogs which may help them in their own English class. Due to these benefits I would say that we are full exploiting the use of public blogs.

Some students may be uncomfortable with the idea of twenty of their peers, and in a sense the world, viewing and judging their writing. This could be considered a challenge to the openness of these blogs and hurt a person’s writing abilities. I know at first I was hesitant about the idea of every other student reading my blogs and making comments on them but we have a nice class that only gives constructive criticism about each blog. Or they say really nice things which make writing these blogs sort of fun. It also allows me to read and write nice things about other people’s blogs which is also fun. So the challenge of being hesitant about the publicity of each blog can be addressed by having confidence in your own writing abilities and taking the time to read other students blogs which may sound similar to your own. Open writing can be difficult but the benefits it presents, such as constructive criticism and new ideas are great rewards.

Feedback and Critique

I think I am as good at offering criticism as any other student in this course. Most of the students have taken an AP English course, including myself; therefore we all have a good foundation regarding reading and writing. My English course had timed writings every week on prompts we wouldn’t know about until the day of the assignment. After we would write these papers we would edit them either in pairs, groups, or as a class. This practice has definitely helped me for doing peer reviews now and makes me somewhat qualified to give criticism. I don’t know what good constructive criticism looks like. I have just finished reading the peer reviews for my own paper and think all of the remarks are educational and helpful. The reason I say I can’t recognize constructive criticism is because a few of my classmates have stated opposite opinions about certain parts of my essay. One person argues that certain sentences are strong while another says the same sentence is unnecessary in my paper. Those are two very opposite opinions but when I hear their reasoning’s I agree with both. This obviously makes me a little rocky in the comprehension of criticism, be it positive or negative.

I believe I can produce good criticism; as good as any other student in the course. I believe that I have had lots of practice throughout high school which has helped me understand how to give criticism without offending the writer. Then again, many other students in this course could have taken an intense English class in high school as well giving them just as much experience. The trick is to include a positive comment for every two negative comments when reviewing another person’s paper. That way you get all the problems discussed and fix while adding in a positive phrases to show that you still have a high opinion of the work. I have been given a lot of critique throughout my history of writing and I don’t think I could pinpoint any one statement that truly changed y writing. Each critique has been extremely helpful for what I was working on at the moment but never stays in my memory past the assignments due date. If I had to choose a critique it would be something my 11th grade English teacher told me. I was never good a spelling and I’m still pretty bad (thank goodness for spell-check) and this teacher noticed this in my essays right away. I always tried to impress her with big vocabulary words but I never knew how to spell them so I just sounded it out and made an educated guess. Well she took me aside one day and said “Ashley, if you don’t know how to spell something don’t use it in your writing. Only use words you are confident with.” I realized that using high vocabulary in an essay will only make your writing sound more sophisticated if you spell them correctly. I still use that advice today.

Shitty First Drafts

After reading Anne Lamott’s essay I wanted to try writing about anything, school lunches included. I absolutely agree with her advice about writing just to write and not worrying about how the first draft sounds or the voices in your head telling you what to say. I think the main reason why most students hate writing so much is because they have a hard time just getting the first sentence out due to the fear that it won’t be perfect. Just the other day my roommate Megan asked me what I blog about all day for my English class and how I could ever take the time to sit down and write so much. I told her that I liked writing and the stuff we blog about is sometimes interesting. I also tell her about the material if I am particularly proud of what I wrote and truly interested in it, like some English loving nerd. When I was telling her about the bathroom blog though she said something that really made me think about how other students, who may not like writing, view this act. She said, “See I would never know how to start writing about bathrooms, I would be stuck on the first sentence forever.” This relates to Lamott’s ideas about perfectionism in writing because that is exactly how my roommate writes. She approaches her writing assignments as if the first draft is the only draft she can turn in for her one and only final grade. This means that right away every word has to be perfect which ultimately ruins the creative flow of writing stunting the essay’s progression altogether. Many students approach writing in a similar way which is why most complain when their English teacher assigns a lengthy essay. They think it will take forever because they spend all their time making it perfect right away.

Its situations like this when I’m glad I take the time to write in my journal each day. I never know where my entries are headed and I never stop to think about anyone else opinions about my writing because I know no one else will be reading it. This allows me to utilize Lamott’s strategy all the time which makes it easier to utilize it for actual assignments. I think Lamott’s strategies are great practices because it gets students writing, something that would not otherwise happen. Writing is like any other activity that takes practice. The more you write the easier it will become which is why writing about school lunches, even if it’s not the assignment due, can be beneficial because it will make writing an actual assignment easier. I didn’t have too many writing anxieties for this upcoming draft because I knew it was simply a draft. I did want to make it as close to the final copy as possible for the fear that I wouldn’t have time to change or add a lot later. But this article reminded me that it is a first draft and it won’t be perfect, so I won’t worry too much.

What Is It?

A rhetorical analysis is when one breaks apart and interprets a piece of media, be it a magazine ad or television show, and distinguishes the parts that appeal to logos, pathos, and ethos. Then he or she reflects on how the use of these rhetorical strategies affects the intended audience and whether the media was effective or ineffective. The purpose of a rhetorical analysis is to become better aware of the media that surrounds us every day in order to make informed decisions and create accurate opinions about what we see. We also use rhetoric to draw forth the main points in a persuasive text or media to help us come to our opinions and ideas. Distinguishing the message, addressing all three appeals on the rhetorical triangle, distinguishing who the intended audience is, and deciding how effective or ineffective the advertisement is must be put into and discussed when attempting a rhetorical analysis. An analysis should be set up in a similar way as what I have just mentioned or in order of what is most important for the specific piece of media that is being analyzed. The set up should be detailed and contain the writer’s personal opinion of what the piece of media means and how it influences them.


I plan to organize my analysis in the order that I have mention in the last paragraph beginning with the message and ending with the effectiveness of the advertisement in general. My introduction paragraphs will introduce the advertisement and why I have chosen to write my rhetorical paper on it. This will included a description of the magazine advertisement stating who is in it, how they are interacting, and where they are placed in regard to one another. It will also state my opinion on the ad and whether I think it is effective or not followed up with my points on why I feel it is positive or negative. The next parts of my paper will defend my opinions and arguments toward the piece of media, which will take up more than a few paragraphs. Within these paragraphs I would like to discuss how the use or lack of use, of pathos, ethos, and logos help or hurt the media and how the intended audience will interpret the media as well. While discussing the audience I will mention how different people may view and interpret the magazine ad in different ways depending on their personal beliefs and opinions. I would then like to discuss the company that produced the advertisement. I will include what the company stands for or believes in and how the media negatively or positively affected their name and logo. Hopefully these topics will take up a good amount of the paper leaving me with only the conclusion. My conclusion will reinforce all my earlier points about the media stating again what the advertisement consists of and who the audience is. I would then like to add my personal opinion of the media and how I personally viewed it when first coming across it. I do have a personal story I would like to share that relates to the media and will explain why I feel the way I do about its message.

WWII Propaganda Posters

While browsing over the World War Two propaganda posters I immediately noticed a difference between media then compared to media today. I find that the approach on how to display media and influence the nation’s population has changed since this war greatly. One thing that caught my attention right away was how the majority of the posters asked something of each person living in America. These posters suggested conserving certain materials like waste fats and hot water, buying war bonds, getting a war job, keeping quiet about military plans, joining a car club to save gas, and even eating nutritious food to stay healthy. This list, I’m sure, could be even longer and people may have followed these tasks then to do their part for the war effort. I personally don’t believe these advertisements would work on today’s population in America for one main reason. It is extremely hard in this day and age to get people to change their lifestyles, especially their time schedule and eating habits. If a sign like the “Eat the Right Food” poster shown was hung today very few people would even give it a second glance on their way to a fast food drive-through. I also think the posters suggesting one shorten his or her showers and return old waste fat would be ineffective because it would too inconvenient within a person’s busy schedule. In short I think America today has become too lazy for poster like this to be effective. I have yet to see a piece of media that asks people to conserve material or change their eating habits for the current war in Iraq.


Another reason why these posters might not work today is simply the fact that they are plain posters and not commercials or web pop-ups instead. In the 1940’s posters caught people’s attention because it was one of the only ways to spread media but because we have more advanced technology today people would disregard posters as a thing of the past. Also current forms of media such as television shows and internet media can express more thought and incorporate more rhetoric within the advertisement because of the advancement in technology. Now that media has evolved in the last 60 years media creators have incorporated a different style to how they persuaded populations. After looking at come media for a number of current problems I noticed that media today focuses a lot more on logos and pathos as opposed to ethos. The World War Two posters focused very heavily on ethos and trusting the government when they tell people to improve their morals and conserve material for soldiers. The poster suggests that a person is not a true American citizen until they have started a car club or found a place at a war job, otherwise appealing to their sense of ethics. Most media for the Iraq war today appeals to logos giving numbers or statistics to the amount of causalities or survey numbers. Also pathos plays an important role in media today. Most advertisements for the BP oil spill showed pictures of animals covered in oil and unable to move which defiantly pulls at a viewers heart strings. These issues are what Americans today are concerned with or afraid of.

Preliminary Thoughts

I have just selected the piece of media that I will be writing about in my rhetorical analysis paper and I believe that writing five pages on this advertisement will be somewhat easy given its message. This advertisement was first published September 9th, 2009 by the company called the World Wildlife Fund (WWF). It is a black and white image of New York City, Twin Towers standing, with over thirty airplanes headed for every building. There are actually too many airplanes to count and every one of them is flying straight down toward, not only the Twin Towers, but all the buildings around them as well. WWF is attempting to make a comparison between the 2004 Indian Ocean tsunami with terrorist attacks of 9/11 by having the caption state “The tsunami killed 100 times more people than 9/11.” I think this is an insensitive comparison between to two events as one was a natural disaster and the other was a deliberate terrorist attack from another country on American soil. I also feel this is insensitive to the families who suffered losses from the attacks of 9/11. They shouldn’t be so brutally reminded of the tragedy only eight years later while innocently reading a magazine.

The strongest rhetorical appeals in this piece of media would be pathos because it brings forth so many emotions not only for survivors and witnesses of 9/11 but also the survivors and witnesses of the 2004 tsunami. In a way, this ad draws out the emotions felt on the day of each tragedy which is overpoweringly a pathos appeal. It also incorporates logos when it gives the statistic that the tsunami killed 100 times more people than 9/11. This is a logical fact making this a logos appeal. These rhetorical methods are not very effective for the message WWF is trying to make due to the extreme measures the ad was taken too. The words underneath the numerical statement are “the planet is brutally powerful. Respect it. Preserve it" making the intended message to care for the planet and our environment. Unfortunately this ad backfired and ended up doing more harm to WWF, than good to our planet. Although the rhetorical methods used are not good for WWF’s intended message, they are good for generating a response out of readers through the use of tragic events and horrible losses.

I don’t think I will have too many roadblocks when writing this paper because I feel very strongly about this ad and the message it is conveying. My uncle has worked in New York City, in a building next to the Twin Towers, since the mid-90s and was unfortunately there on the day the towers were hit. Thankfully he caught a ferry and made in out of the city in time but I know a number of his friends weren’t as lucky. If this ad disturbed me, than I am sure if I were to show him, it would hurt him as well. Due to the fact that I have a personal story to help motivate me while writing my paper I don’t think I will run into any roadblocks.

Gender & Bathrooms

The average American doesn’t think twice about the sign on the door when using a public bathroom. This is because the average American is cisgender, which is when one’s gender matches his or her biological sex allowing them to have no hesitation when choosing the girl figure or boy figure on the wall. But there are still many people who might not have this peace of mind, making bathroom boy/girl figures demeaning and hurtful. After viewing some of the signs shown even I was confused and slightly angry at the assumptions made through something as simple as a bathroom sigh.

From what I have observed, as an American, are people in the United States have a very narrow and close minded view of how to construct gender. Americans construct gender and associate certain things with certain genders in a very hurtful, and often untrue, way. Girls are paired with the color pink, shopping, bows, skirts, small waists, breast, and vaginas. Men are paired with the color blue, football or sports, bowties, pants, broad shoulders, and penises. By using one, or several, of these categorizations in bathroom signs would be making the assumption that every male or female should wear pants or go shopping which isn’t always the case.

There was one bathroom sign showed in this blog post that caught my attention and silicified my idea that Americans have a narrow view of the differences in gender. This sign showed one figure thinking about shopping, which was the girl, and the other figure thinking about football, which was the boy. This bathroom sign simply says that it is a man’s job to watch football and woman’s job to go shopping. I found this assumption untrue because not all men love football and I know many girls who don’t enjoy shopping, myself being one of them. This conclusion could go the other way as well by stating that some women are into football and some men enjoy shopping.

Another sign that stood out was the bathroom signs from Iran posted in this blog. The man is shown as a regular figure but the woman is shown as wearing a long skirt and a hijab. This shows how important it is in that country for women to follow the dress code and cover their bodies and faces. If the American girl sign always has a skirt on and the Iran girl sign always has a hijab on her head then the only thing to conclude is that a hijab is equivalent a skirt in Iran. This came as a shock to me because I never knew how important the dress code for women was in Iran until I saw that bathroom sign. When a bathroom sign has a certain outfit on then one knows it is a major part of that countries culture and way of life.

Culture states that men and women should look and behave a certain way which is why these bathroom signs are the way they are. From an early age people were taught the appropriate way to behave and the appropriate things to like according to their gender. We are taught these things through our family, friends, and of course the media. Luckily I have never come across a problematic bathroom sign, but I could in the near future.

Rhetorical Triangle

There are no elements in this HIV ad that appeal to logos because there is no statistical data, scientific facts, or case studies mentioned. Logos appeals to logical reasoning and this ad does not seem to be focusing on the facts of this disease. If this ad mentioned the number of men and women who are living with HIV it would appeal to logos because that would be statistical numbers to get a point across to audiences. Another example of logos that this ad could have utilized is a chart showing the progression of HIV in the population over the past ten years. Both of these examples would relate to logos because it uses factual data to present a scientific view of the disease. This method is most effective in magazines related to science fields or mathematical articles because the readers would respond most to the data presented. Ethos, however, is very prominent in this advertisement due to the fact that the pictured man is stating that he believes in the value of responsibility when dealing with HIV.

Ethos deals with the moral and ethical values of what is being advertised and mentioning the character trait responsibility creates a very moral picture in the minds of readers. It motivates readers to become responsible as well and become motivated to take care of their own health. This is a moral reaction because it effects reader’s ethical beliefs of HIV health. Pathos is used slightly in this ad by trying to draw the emotion of responsibility and obligation to protect others from HIV. Readers may feel strongly, or have strong emotions such as sadness or hope, toward this ad depending on how HIV has affected their lives. If someone affected by HIV reads this ad they could gain hope by knowing that they could keep their health condition in check and prevent it from spreading to their partner. It also could give HIV patients courage to speak out about their condition and receive help or even give non-HIV suffers the courage to ask their partner to get checked. These are examples of pathos because it brings out emotions, such as hope and courage, from audiences.

Ethos is defiantly the strongest appeal in this advertisement simply because it focuses on being responsible when handling this health complication. It presents the idea that the “in thing” to do is tell a partner when one is infected with HIV instead of being ashamed and keeping it a secret. By presenting this very open ad about HIV it will allow people to become more open as well. The whole message is to state that it is a person’s ethical duty to stop the spread of HIV by being responsible and telling a partner before becoming intimate. I believe this message is effective because it speaks to everyone with HIV and encourages them to do their part in the goal to end the spread of HIV.

How to Say Nothing in 500 Words

Paul McHenry Roberts shed some interesting light on the common errors of writing. All of the points he made were intelligent and beneficial to students. Even though it was written more than several years ago it still holds truth for students today. It may even remind students today how valuable his seemingly simple strategies are such as the importance of avoiding colorless words and increasing or expanding one’s vocabulary. The topics discussed that caught my interest were avoiding the obvious content, becoming aware of pat expressions, and the meaning of colorless words. These topics grabbed my attention because I realized that I often use these unsuccessful writing strategies in my own work. On more than one occasion I have stuck to the obvious and modest answers to writing prompts, used more than one cliché pat expression, and snuck in the colorless word “nice” in my essays. I was already aware that I use colorless words and several pat expressions making my work sometimes corny and immature. These problems were mentioned by my high school English teachers and I have been trying to correct my errors for a while.

Reading Robert’s essay brought this subject back to my attention allowing me to continue working on my writing skills throughout this course. It reminded me of the errors that I usually make when writing essays allowing me to become more aware when writing in the future. This will help me continue to improve my writing strategies and techniques. Avoiding the obvious content was an error I didn’t realize I needed to fix, however; the more I read on this topic the more I noticed myself making this mistake. If I were to write an essay about college football I would have went for the obvious content such as how it affects a student athlete’s academic progress or how sports practices consume the majority of student athletes time making it difficult to obtain strong time management skills.

Hearing some of Robert’s examples showed me how to incorporate humor into my writing to give it more of a voice and unique style that would help my paper stand out amongst a stack of similar works. I found his reasoning as to why college football should be abolished, because “football stars hog all the beautiful women,” extremely funny and a point that would hold my attention throughout the entire essay. Another subject I found interesting and educational was the author’s strategy on how to decide what to write about. His idea was to write out the first topics that come to your mind and then throw those ideas away because every other student will have similar thoughts. This is a very helpful hint that I plan to use throughout my college writing courses and also within the workforce. In this present time in the workforce it is vital to standout on a resume in order to earn the job and writing in an unconventional way can help separate a single person from every other hopeful employee. Overall I found Robert’s essay enlightening and educational. Many students would benefit from Robert’s advice